EMPATHY AND COMPASSION IN MARRIAGE

LOVEBIRDS' DEVOTIONAL

Enriching Matrimonies

March 30, 2025

EMPATHY AND COMPASSION IN MARRIAGE

By Anselm Ahman

Scripture:

‘REJOICE WITH THEM THAT DO REJOICE, AND WEEP WITH THEM THAT WEEP’

(ROMANS 12: 15)

MARRIAGE HAS BROUGHT YOU AND YOUR SPOUSE INTO the closest and deepest human relationship on Earth. It has made the two of you ONE FLESH. Therefore, if there’s any where your humanity should be seen, it’s in your relationship with each other.

In Luke Chapter 10, we have the story of the man who fell into the hands of Robbers as he travelled from Jerusalem to Jericho. The Robbers showed their inhumanity and lack of conscience by beating and robbing him. As he lay bleeding and dying,
a Levite and a Priest walked past him at different times, each completely unconcerned and untouched by his plight; showing that they were only religious but empty of the milk of human kindness.

But when the Samaritan met the man in the pool of his own blood, empathy, compassion and pity welled up in him and he stopped his journey to save him. Jesus declared the Samaritan as a good example of what it means to show love to a fellow man.

If you’re expected by God to demonstrate human feelings to strangers, how much more the Spouse with whom you’re one flesh?

Once upon a time, Farmer went to the farm with his adolescent Son. As they finished the day’s work and set out for home, the young boy was stung by a scorpion. He screamed because of the great pain he felt in his leg. As the boy was writhing in pains, the father surprisingly showed little concern. After a few minutes, he told the boy, “Up! Let’s be going. You can’t can’t keep sitting there because of ordinary scorpion sting! We must go back home.” In his agony, the boy cried: “Father, I’m in great pains and can’t even move.” The old man simply made light of his son’s deep suffering and made no efforts to cry out for help or run to a nearby house for assistance because he was detached from the boy’s feelings even though he was the very Dad.

But several weeks after, as often happens in life, on their way from the farm, the old man was stung by a scorpion. In his pains, he asked his son to forgive his past careless attitude saying: “I never knew that scorpion sting is so terribly painful!”

You are in marriage for much more than kissing, cuddling and making love to each other. You’re with each other first as COMPANIONS AND HELPERS to one another. You’re each other’s keeper. As each other’s keeper, companion and helper, therefore, you’re each other’s first Neighbour, Doctor, Nurse, Pastor, etc. The divine command to love your neighbour as yourself must first be obeyed in your marriage before elsewhere. Your Mate must first partake of your obedience to that command before your fellow church members, colleagues at work, etc.

The demonstration of empathy and fellow feeling towards your Mate on a constant basis will engender Peace and Love in your marriage and home.

Our anchor scripture says: “Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.” (Romans 12:15).
It’s a call to, when ever necessary, switch from yourself and your personal concerns and partake of the joy or grief of your fellowman. This means, what ever affects your husband or wife should be of great concern to you.

It also means that whenever your Mate cannot fulfill certain marital obligations because of a sudden and unexpected circumstance that causes them pain, you should promptly believe them, understand with them and switch from your expectations and attend to them.

For example, if you returned from work expecting to meet a ready meal but Madam tells you she couldn’t cook because she’s been experiencing severe and persistent back pain. Empathy and compassion require you to instantly plug into their feelings and be part of their pains; instead of behaving like the cruel Farmer who was detached from the excruciating pains of his son and expected him to get on his feet a few short minutes after a horrible scorpion sting; when the boy hadn’t received any treatment.

Marriage should make you not only romantically and sexually connected but emotionally, mentally and physically connected.

Connectedness rather than disconnect would help you to be in touch with each other on all levels and at all times. When you are both in this harmony, you can easily pick up your Spouse’s situation even from their voice in a phone call; whether they’re in distress or otherwise.

Be balanced in your thinking and expectations. Marriage offers you many rights and privileges but there’ll sometimes come situations in which you’d have no option but be matured enough to understand that you must give up your rights for the sake of your Spouse’s need or welfare.

Always see your Spouse as yourself and often put yourself in their shoes and treat them as you’d love to be treated if you were in their circumstance.

In Marriage, you’re ONE BODY and should be partaker of each other’s pain and glory.

“And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it.”(1 Corinthians 12: 26)

Finally, we are told in Colossians

“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness” “(Colossians 3:12A).
Therefore, Empathy and Compassion must constantly be part of you as you live together with your Spouse.

FAITH DECREE:
LET THE HUMANITY OF READER OF TODAY’S DEVOTIONAL BE REAWAKENED, IN JESUS’ MIGHTY NAME!